Your New Year’s Tango Resolution
Let’s set your New Year’s Tango Resolution? It is very easy to understand yourself, watching how you behave in tango.
“What do you want to magnify?”
I stopped for a second. Where did that question come from? And why was she asking me that? And… in the middle of a tanda? I shook my head, and whispered:
-Let me answer that after this song. We hugged again.
Usually, my mind becomes quiet when I dance. I love silence in tango, both inside and outside. But that question fired up my thoughts. I went over the discussion we had before that question. She was telling me a story:
“A long time ago I was sitting in a milonga in Buenos Aires. I was trying to dance with a milonguero on the other side of the room. But he kept rejecting my mirada (I only ask using the cabeceo). After a long, long, loooong time we “exchanged” the cabeceo and we danced.
I asked him “why didn’t you ask me before?”
“The music wasn’t right for our dance”.
Somehow this special man knew what would work for us to dance together and what wouldn’t. I am grateful for that experience, both the dance, and the lesson. It was an important message I have never forgotten.”
When she told me that story, I was in awe of the subtlety of this man’s way of thinking. And how this considering and caring part of his character came to life through tango.
I couldn’t help but think that tango works as a big magnifying glass of what we have inside us.
If you have a bit of ego in you, and then you become good in tango, your ego becomes huge. If you are a humble person, and then you become good in tango, you find more reasons to stay humble. Pride, low self esteem, good energy, jealousy, caring or whatever else; put it in tango, and it magnifies.
I discussed with her that idea, and her response was beautiful:
Do you know why tango is like a magnifying glass?”
I wasn’t sure how to put it into words. She saved me:
“Tango materializes thoughts and behaviours. Things that are normally inside our heads, become physical reality through tango. You can see people with big egos from far away: They never dance with someone that doesn’t dance well. Their ego materializes in actions. I am sure you have seen many times dancers accidentally hitting each other.
Imagine a situation where it was obviously one leader’s fault; A leader that is in general dancing respectfully. Look at the face of the other three people for their reactions. You can learn a lot. Do they react with kindness, a smile, forgiveness, understanding? Or with anger and negativity?
Tango materializes their thoughts and character; Their state of mind becomes visible.
It is very easy to understand yourself, watching how you behave in tango.
I once danced with a great leader who had a… unique practice. After dancing a tanda with an amazing dancer, above his technique limits, he danced with someone that had a technique level way below. He told me:
“I received a gift, but a gift that I am not supposed to keep, a gift I am supposed to deliver to another person. How much more happiness does a gift bring when it doesn’t stay in the hands of only one person?”
“I am using tango to develop myself. I want to create a character who is more giving, with an abundance mindset. By setting as a goal to always give back everything good I receive in tango, I am magnifying my capacity and habit of giving”.”
The music ended.
I was lost in my thoughts during the whole song. I looked at her. She smiled, knowingly.
“I understood you were away during the song. I promise you did the same ocho, ocho, media luna sequence at least 10 times.” I smiled. Yes, that’s what I do when my mind goes away.nIt’s my go-to sequence when my mind is away.
“It’s OK. It was my fault, I asked you a question. I took you off your body, and into your mind.
But now you have to answer.
The end of the year is coming. What do you want to magnify using tango this year? What are your New Year’s Eve tango goals when it comes to who you want to become?
What do YOU want to magnify?”
-Healing, I said. I want to be able to heal and receive healing through my dance.
“Then that’s your tango goal for 2022. Everytime you dance, have that intention. Everytime you enter in a milonga, have that intention. Everytime someone steps on you with her heal… Have that intention.”
Your New Year’s Tango Resolution
What do YOU want to magnify this year? Using tango as your tool, what do YOU want to bring more into your life and the life of others in 2020? If you liked it, don’t forget to share.
Dimitris Bronowski – from the book Tangofulness
Dimitris Bronowski – Portugal
Dimitris Bronowski is the editor and co-author of the book Tango Tips by the Maestros (Amazon’s #1 best seller in the Dance category) and the author of Tangofulness, the most translated tango book in the world. A tanguero since 2009, he sees in tango an opportunity to heal and be healed. His mission is to help tango dancers around the world experience more moments of meaning in tango and bring together the global tango family through the Tango Partner app. His expertise is in marketing and community building. His heart is in tango.